‘Return of the Living Elves’ – Brian Asman (Mutated Media)

 

Page Count: 154 Pages

Now here’s a book that would have been on the ol’ TBR Pile for three years, next month, if I hadn’t picked it up yesterday… That’s not the longest a book has spent on the pile but is a little embarrassing; having said that though, there’s only a limited window to read Christmas fiction and if you miss that, it’s another year before you can try again ;o) It took me a little while then but I got there in the end! I didn’t want to wait another year so I thought I’d get in a little early this time (30th November falls within the ‘window’, please tell me it isn’t just me who is like this…) This will be a quicker post, than normal as I’ve got a couple of hospital appointments today and also, well… the page count is a big clue ;o) Here goes…

When Christmas supply warehouse manager Jimmy tries to help new employee Tommy find a last-minute gift for his girlfriend, they accidentally unleash a long-forgotten and very seasonal genetic experiment with a taste for human flesh. As elf-zombie hybrids take over the small town of Pine Canyon, California, Jimmy fights to survive alongside a Christpunk named Landfill, and a mysterious, PTSD-stricken soldier. Hold onto your stockings because the elves are back, baby!

It’s very obvious where ‘Return of the Living Elves’ took its inspiration from (and that’s the whole point really, I’m not knocking it at all) so if you haven’t seen ‘Return of the Living Dead’, I strongly suggest you give it a watch before reading ‘Elves’. All the little references will make a lot more sense and ‘Return of the Living Dead’ is a great film, you should watch it anyway. I suspect that anyone reading this will have seen ‘Return of the Living Dead’, just had to double-check ;o)

Once you’ve done this, or if you’ve seen ‘Return of the Living Dead’ already…

‘Return of the Living Elves’ was a lot of fun to read; a nice little riff on its source material and full of moments that made me laugh out loud, whether they were ‘in-jokes’ or points where Asman addresses the reader directly. There is a gleeful irreverence, throughout, that really lets the plot flow. It’s all over before you know it, and there are no surprises, but there are a lot of laughs to be had and I really need those right now so… Well played ‘Return of the Living Elves’, well played ;o)

Asman also finds time for the obligatory ‘meditations on Christmas’, that you would expect in any Christmas fiction (zombie elves or not), and I appreciated the way that these were handled. You have to have these moments (otherwise it’s not a ‘proper Christmas Book’) but Asman doesn’t let them overshadow the real point of the plot, to have a little fun with a classic horror movie and just entertain.

‘Return of the Living Elves’ may not change your life but was a thoroughly enjoyable way to spend time waiting for my Amazon delivery (how is it I’m doing my kids’ Christmas Shopping…?) and I won’t be surprised if I find myself re-watching ‘Return of the Living Dead’ in the next couple of days. If that’s what you’re after, I think you’ll enjoy it too.

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