'Doctor Who: The Leisure Hive' (1980)


So a couple of days ago I had my Covid booster jab which meant that there was an air of inevitability to my waking up feeling like absolute crap yesterday morning... Oh well, it's still not as bad as having actual Covid, and I'm good now, so can't complain too much I guess. Yesterday then was a day for taking all the paracetamol and searching in vain for anything decent on Prime. Luckily I realised it was like I'd been saving a Doctor Who DVD in the knowledge that this was going to happen...

I was all of about four years old (almost five) when 'The Leisure Hive' first appeared on TV so I've got vague memories of an alien dying because bits fell off his head and the scene on the beach at the beginning. I couldn't remember a thing about the rest of it though which made 'The Leisure Hive' a little more intriguing to watch...

The Doctor and Romana decide to forego Brighton Beach and take a much needed holiday on the pleasure planet of Argolis. Ravaged decades ago by an interstellar war between the Argolin and the Foamasi, Argolis now hosts the Leisure Hive – an ideal retreat for tourists from all over the cosmos. But a series of 'accidents' leads the Doctor and Romana to discover that the Hive holds dark secrets...

So… The first time that I’d seen ‘The Leisure Hive’, in just over forty years, and… Wow, no wonder I couldn’t remember the story (although I did get to find out why ‘bits falling off an alien’s head’ = Death, advanced cellular degradation apparently, you learn something new every day). ‘The Leisure Hive’ is one part murder mystery, one part organised crime drama and a lot of parts people talking about why their experiments in time manipulation are working or mostly not working. It took a lot for me to get into it and I suspect that four year old me decided to do pretty much anything else rather than sit through this. I don’t blame him… There is some interesting stuff to get into here but I’m no good with regular science at the best of times, let alone talk about tachyons (which are real but, you know what I mean…) The ‘murder mystery’ bits do keep things ticking over though and that’s ok but…

Here’s the thing.

Do you remember watching ‘The Phantom Menace’ for the first time and feeling just a little bit deflated when you realised that everything that happened, in the films to come, could be traced back to a trade dispute between the Trade Federation and Naboo? You know what I mean, it’s not exactly exciting is it? And that’s where I am with ‘The Leisure Hive’, organised crime and corporate shenanigans just aren’t that exciting and unfortunately, that’s the whole theme underlining this story. Even the Doctor’s hearts weren’t really in it, he only really stirred himself when there was a threat of interplanetary warfare on the horizon. And if the Doctor isn’t really that interested, why should we be?

‘The Leisure Hive’ was, well… alright I guess. There’s nothing that signalled it as a bad story but equally, there was nothing that made it stand out either and that was what I was after. Disappointing then but, you can’t win them all. 

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