'Blood Machines' (2019)


I'm ashamed to admit it but I will always be sucked in by persistent advertising. Honestly, bang on about something for long enough and I will end up buying it (and probably buying it again). So it was then that the adverts/trailers for 'Blood Machines' started off as 'just getting in the way of my watching clips of 'The Office' on Youtube' (I really need to get myself a life at some point), moved on to making me think that 'You know, I really should give this a go' and finished, earlier this evening, with my watching it. I'm not sure why Shudder have split the film into three chunks, and are presenting it as a 'Season' (when everything else says it's a film) but if you watch 'Blood Machines', you'll find out that there are other questions that you really should be asking. Like, 'what the hell...?' and 'did Blood Machines end up breaking the record for 'most naked identical women in a finale?' You will probably also wonder where you can get the soundtrack.

Whether you manage to answer these questions or not, 'Blood Machines' is awesome.

A spaceship is shot down, by bounty hunters seeking to capture the rogue AI within, and crash lands straight into the hands of a a cult seeking to heal the ship. The spaceship is beyond saving but the bounty hunters witness a ceremony where the AI is reborn, in human form, and promptly departs the planet at great speed. The chase is on with the bounty hunters pursuing the AI while other plans start to come to fruition...

'Blood Machines' is, well.... it's awesome to watch but trying to get your head round it is something else. Maybe I should have watched the 'Turbo Killer' music video (the prequel, apparently) first? Either way, my advice is not to bother. Seriously, just go with the flow and let the stunning visuals (it all looks amazing, trippy as hell but amazing, creepily reminiscent of an 'ABCs of Death' short though which isn't a bad thing) and the creepily nostalgic synth soundtrack do their job. Talking about that soundtrack, I don't know a lot about music but I do know that Carpenter Brut's score is just perfect for this trip into 'Weird Space'; a dark but glorious cocktail of the unsettling and what I am calling 'epic space tunes'. Look, I told you that I don't know a lot about music...

The story itself can be very simple at times (a bad guy getting hit by a dose of karma) but it's all the other stuff going on that just adds to the mystery and sheer 'alien-ness' (what is it about this movie that has me making words up?) which, in turn, drives the story to its epic conclusion. Again, just go with it. Space Opera doesn't have to make sense, it's all about the action/'quest' and 'Blood Machines' has loads of that. It's as much fun as you'd expect and it's all helped by the actors just totally throwing themselves into it and going with the flow as well.

If you like your Space Opera a little on the weird side (and with some elements of horror) and with a soundtrack that's nudging its way into 'Concept Album' territory, I would totally recommend giving 'Blood Machines' a go. It's mad as hell and that's why I love it.

('Blood Machines' is streaming on 'Shudder')

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